Hope you all have a wonderful Mother’s Day, whether you took the time to spend with your mom, keeping in touch with your mom if you’re distant from each other, if your mom is no longer living in this world, or if your relationships are strained. Still, we should all be thankful to our mothers, regardless of your relationships with them, for giving us life. It really saddens me to see people showing so much hatred and disrespect for their mothers, not even realizing that they wouldn’t be existing if their mothers never existed. How am I supposed to give respect to anyone who doesn’t know how to respect their own families?
Anyway, moving on. I haven’t been blogging for several weeks now. Speaking of family, as always, my family’s strength continues to build up, and our beliefs in hopes and miracles continue. I am truly blessed for having such a wonderful family, with strong and wise parents, a dependable brother, and the lovely and talented sisters. We may not be living under the same roof anymore, but we have not forgotten one another and the right times that we do get together. That is more than enough for me.
This is a very late post, but it’s also my very first post for the month of May. This is definitely another one of those hodgepodge entries that I would normally write about that doesn’t really have a specific purpose, therefore, random ramblings will be infesting this entry very soon.
Your friends are not your personal search engines
I am also thankful for Sir Tim Berners-Lee and the peeps at CERN for developing and creating the world wide web. I will no longer have to run to the local library to find my answers to life’s mysteries, nor will I have to bug the people closest to me for answers, knowing they won’t know the answer anyway. I rather have family and friends give me tips and guides to where to look for or even some clues for me to use to find what I’m seeking for.
One thing I do end up doing as I go through the journey of seeking answers, at the same time, I acquire something new and then appreciate it. I learn new things along the way, and even though they may not be useful knowledge today, for sure they will be useful one way or the other in the near future. Make a note, write them down, make yourself remember, so you can search and discover further about this new knowledge that you have just acquired. When you finally understand, you can finally share it with others who may also not be aware that such knowledge even existed. This is how I’ve gotten some vast knowledge about Asian skincare routines, techniques, traditions, and just the overall culture. To be more specific, Korean skincare, Taiwanese skincare, and of course, Japanese skincare. And now, because of my love for them, I started working on Symmetry so I can chronicle my experiences with Asian beauty, relate them to some of the things that I learned from the elders growing up, and of course, share these words to everyone who may be interested. May is also Asian Pacific Islander Heritage Month here in the U.S., and I would really love it if I can get Symmetry up and running before the end of the month.
Now, I feel appreciated when friends come up and ask me for help with something I have knowledge on. For example, with web designing/coding websites, I do what I can to share what I know and even show them how to do it. But how do I do it? Just like everyone else, I search Google, check the eBooks that I have on my Kindle, check out textbooks on my shelves. I even provide them the sources of where I’ve got my answers from. Some planned to look into them. Others, well… I’m going to write about them next.
So, what about these “others”? I don’t mind being asked for help, nor that I don’t mind helping out a friend, but what if you realize something that all these favors that these “others” have been asking you aren’t just small, but are also easy to find through the internet, books, or even at their local places? This is where I’m starting to feel uncomfortable and become suspicious that these “others” would just ask you small favors, knowing they can seek the answers themselves, because of laziness…
Or worse… I have become their personal search engine. And frankly, I don’t like to be somebody’s personal search engine. You’re an adult, the internet is free, you have a car, you can search the library, join a Facebook group or a forum community dedicated to these things, and ask for answers. Don’t be asking your friends to seek the answers for you, because you’re not gonna learn anything if you have somebody else do all the work for you. If you’re serious in becoming that future career, the hard work and those small favors can be done by yourself.
This is one of the reasons why I rarely to never ask any of my friends for favors or answers to small questions, knowing I can seek the answers by myself, ask some experienced people in Facebook groups or forum communities when I’m stuck with my searching, or just simply get off the computer, find a book on Kindle or at the library, and read for the answers. When I get exhausted, I just step out of the computer and lie down to rest or do something else, like water painting on my Buddha Board.
I do not have all the answers to life’s mysteries. Like everybody else, I go to Google to find my answers. But I am not going to be searching around Google or bookmarked sources for other people. They can do that by themselves.
Sharing your project plans and ideas to your friends ≠ friends taking/stealing your plans and ideas for their own personal projects
And the worst thing that will come next when this happens is if this same friend does not credit you for the idea/inspiration/plans of their project, especially when you’re still at the very early development stage and this other person already rushing to get his/her project up and running. What the heck is this, a contest?
It makes me wonder if these people already have their content ready made proofread and formatted before they can even launch a project similar as the project you’re already working on tirelessly. I know a friend who opened a Facebook page for her creatives, then all of a sudden, another friend decided to open the same thing for her own creatives1 some few minutes later. If that happens, at least, give credit to where it’s due.
This issue has been bothering me for a bit, so much that I’ve been giving so many silent treatments to these people because really, it’s their project. They don’t need opinions of other people to make it better. For me, that’s like giving away what you prefer, and by the time you got your project up, just awhile after that other person’s project was up, those who end up visiting it may end up saying that you have copied from that other person.
It’s happened to me before with one of my fansites/character shrines in the past, and I am not very pleased. And to think that we’re already adults, there are still other people out there acting like a bunch of rich spoiled brats. Horrible.
What on earth is going on with people today, I wonder? Is searching around for answers and tips on Google and online communities a thing of the past now, and that they start relying on friends (especially the ones who probably have no clue of what these people are working on anyway) to seek answers for them.
Jeez, get over yourselves. If you want to have a successful project solely built by you, all the “dirty work,” such as searching through Google, is part of the very many tasks project creators must go through as its first step. It just doesn’t make any sense to me why some of these people all of a sudden open their projects in public and yet there’s barely any content in them?
With the Symmetry project, I keep a notebook, where I write notes and plans on what I’m going to write about once this site is launched. I may not be ready for the blog/site itself, but I’ve already got the content ready to be published in public, so to speak. So, keep an eye for it.
Let this be a lesson to everyone. Seek your answers and you shall find them. Next, test them on your project to see if they will work or not. It’s how projects are being built in the first place: trial and error, and everything else.
Seek and you shall find.
On the sidenote...
- as long as they’re her own creations and not ripped off from someone else’s hard work [↩]