As much as I can, I want to contain all the pain and the anger building up inside of me since last night. I think a few of you may probably know what1 I’m talking about.
I have never written a personal rant about another person in this blog since I started blogging several years ago.2
Before I wrote this entry, I was writing a very long rant about some ungrateful, inconsiderate, and most of all selfish person whom I’ve always considered a friend, simply because she has done a lot of wrongs behind my back. In fact, when she even tried to talk to me and “make amends” on Facebook messenger, she blacklisted/blocked my IP from her blog and even talked shit about me with crap that she and I both know is untrue. Unfortunately for my end, a few of you (yes, many of you who frequently comment here on my blog comment on her blog too) took her side. After all, she didn’t exactly give you the details of what exactly happened between her and me. All she said about me was that I was annoying and that I was “lecturing her about family life and other things” when she just kept on complaining and complaining about her family and it wasn’t just in private, but it’s always written there on her blog, in almost every single blog entry she’s written. I could go on and on, but then I would be going off-subject and I would be sidetracked. ????
On the other hand, this is my blog. She writes whatever she wants in her blog3, therefore I should be doing the same. My initial thoughts would be that if I do the same as she did with me,4 I would be no better than she is.5 However, I also have the right to show my anger and pain to everyone, just like how she has the right to self-pity herself and “play victim” on her blog.6
As I write this entry, she has done exactly what she wrote in her latest entry before she deleted that. She says she was sorry for stabbing me behind my back, and yet on the outside, she says the opposite of that. What is the best word that I should describe that kind of person?7 Why am I wasting my time dealing with her and writing this quick entry, knowing that if I unleash out my anger and pain, the only way for her to respond was to ignore me and then do something else behind my back once again8 to make herself feel better? Is that how a “friend” should be like?
Rather than continuing on about her, I will say these things. Actually, this is more of like the lessons I’ve learned coming from this so-called “friendship.” I would also like for everyone to take heed also and take care of themselves and never let their guard down, unlike the way I’ve let my guard down because of my heartfelt sincerity towards people:
- When you meet someone and decide to become friends, be sure that person likes and appreciates you for who you are as a person, along with the things that interest you or the things that you created that made everyone appreciate of your work and your efforts. Or rather, be sure that the person’s primary reason for wanting to become friends with you is that the person admires you for being you. Remember, you are a person, not a number.
- When this someone suddenly asks you for a favor in exchange for nothing, be cautious about this. I mean as friends, sure, we would be willing to do their favors. However, be aware that this person is being sincere about this favor, and that this person appreciates you for the efforts that you’ve done to get that favor completed. Most of all, you have to also be sure that this person understands that favors don’t get completed in a few seconds, a few minutes, or a few hours, and that this person is willing to wait patiently.
- Be sure that this person also returns the favor by doing exactly as you asked this person to do in order to complete this favor. Sometimes, a favor is needed to be done by two people: you and that person who asks you for that favor.9
- If this person responds to your ranting out your feelings for what that person did wrong to you by ignoring you by all means, you know this person doesn’t really care about you, but rather, she is mainly concerned about herself and being sure she gets exactly what she wants from you and not bother about your feelings.
Lastly, I shall leave you with this quote to end this entry. Please, keep it in your hearts and in your minds for the sake of yourself and for everyone in your life.
Friendship… is not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.
– Muhammad Ali
The entry that I decided to hold off to before I wrote this one is completely detailed with what happened along with screenshots and emails. I have been angry on several occasions but never have I been this pissed off that I was really ready, willing, and able to expose everything, just to show the whole world who she really is. Yes, that may probably be the very worst of me at my online presence. Everyone may call me out for it too. And yet here I am, writing an alternative to that very nasty original entry.
If you are interested in learning to know more about my situation, I’d be happy to share it with you. It should be a private matter, but since she herself made a mistake of making everything public on her blog before she deleted it, hell, why not?
Yeah. That’s how I’m seriously pissed off right now. I can’t even do my class homework or even practice my manga drawing drills and brush lettering because of her. Hell, these past few days, I’ve given so much of my free time to do what I just mentioned just to do this favor she asked of me, and yet in return, this is what I get.10
I am the worst for writing this now, but I’ve got rights just like her and everyone else. I have the right to express my feelings in any form, words included. If I’m going to be bashed for this, so be it. Whatever.
On the sidenote...
- or rather, who… [↩]
- Well, not to my knowledge anyway. And if I did, I’ve grown past that and all is forgotten. [↩]
- while playing victim at the same time [↩]
- and since she deleted that paragraph on that entry, I took a screenshot of it for the record [↩]
- which is true, by the way [↩]
- She can’t see her flaws, and when someone else points out all the mistakes she’s made, rather than admitting to them, apologizing for them, and learning from them, she decides to do the self-pitying game and play the victim, declaring to the whole world that she hates that person. [↩]
- a hypocrite, maybe? [↩]
- by humiliating me in public by writing about me in my back without names mentioned (even though she made it so obvious) so everyone else can read it and eventually “take her side” instead of learning the other side of the story… [↩]
- Believe me, there is nothing worse than you asking that other person to give you some kind of access to something or even contact another person for help under her name when she decides to neglect it simply because “she forgot.” [↩]
- by paying somebody else with actual money for a new theme while I was working my butt off building a child theme out of an expensive $35 premium theme that I fully paid myself (by being a lifetime subscription member of a WordPress theme club) for free. Hell, I could’ve charged her $100 to build her a new theme, which also includes the $35 in there, but I didn’t. I decided to do it for free out of friendship and sincerity. Hell, when she asked me for this favor, she even asked me if I could do it for free. I could’ve said no, but I didn’t. Now you know who I’m talking about now. [↩]